by tess
Long ago and far away, I worked at a business that was very big into “emotional maturity.” For reasons obvious to anyone who has met me, I scrambled to find a new job. STAT!
On Sunday night, my current boss somehow managed to jam a cotton swab so far and so hard into his ear that it bled for hours necessitating an ER visit. Upon hearing this story, my brain was forced to select between two possible responses:
#1. Oh, heavens. I’m so sorry. I hope that there was no permanent damage!
#2. Ewwwwwwwww. Grosssssss. OH MY GOD. Blaeeecchhhhhhhh. Oh, that is SOOOOOOO DISGUSTING. Ahhhhhhhh. Ewwwwwwwwwwww. God, that’s just so completely GROOOSSSSSSSS. Uuuuuuucccccccggghhhkkkkkkkkk. I’m gonna barf. GAACKK.
Honestly, it was HOURS before a single sentiment in choice #1 came to mind.
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