F1 vs. NASCAR: Part Two

by gretchen

I've gotten myself under control. You're forgive my ridiculous anti-NASCAR rant (though I'm still anti-NASCAR). Until. The Day. I. Die. And now let me tell you one more reason why:

Rain.

The boys in the nothing-stock-about-em stock cars, have to stop when the sky squeezes even the smallest bit of moisture out. And I would like to know why. First, they have windshields. Second, they are inside the car. Third, they are driving in one direction, turning four corners which all have the same embankment and angle. So, if you ask me, they're cowards.

Formula 1, on the other hand, gave a stupendous example of why their racing is the best. No, it's not just because yesterday Mark Webber, hands-down the nicest and hottest man in motorsports finally got his recently-shattered leg on the podium, but because for the second race in a row, those boys were speeding around twists and turns in heavy downpour. Oh, and they are part of the car, not in the car. Their windshields are their helmet visors -- do imagine what happens to your glasses when you ride your bike in the rain. Now conjugate to a helmet and contemplate the fogging. Now add to that rooster tails galore, rivers of water on the track, and go over 150 miles an hour. What have you got? Basically driving blindfolded.

And if that's not fun to watch, I don't know what is.
You get this, this, or this.

Sure, they called the last race in Malaysia when the monsoon arrived and decided not to relent. That's because they are adventurous. Not stupid.

So, in terms of exciting rain races:
SASSIFRASSCAR: -23
F1: 172

NOTE: In the spirit of the FIAs inclination toward complicated procedures and silly points allocations, Crease in the Pants has its own method of ranking, which will be changed without notice and at will and will only be described using excessively complicated legalese that even we don't understand. Jean Todt: take note that we fans DO NOT LIKE THIS ABOUT THE FIA. And we're telling you because we all know you backed away from Ferrari so you can take over the FIA, though you looked so plain in Shanghai without your crimson shirt...